It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
