I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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