I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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