You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
