How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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