he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
