these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
