There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
