Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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