we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Randomize
