She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
