i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
