just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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