I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
