So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
