I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
