Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I need to calm my uterus...
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize