sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
We just shotgunned beers for America
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
