Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize