i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
only if we run a train.
done.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
