Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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