My hair reeks of homosexuality.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
