I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
im having a threesome with these popsicles
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
