My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
