So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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