Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
