And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
