Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Are we still banned from the library?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
