what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize