ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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