You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
