I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
