Got a toothbrush?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
