sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
