I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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