Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
