we have officially lost it.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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