I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
