I just pynch a tree in the face
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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