I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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