If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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