i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
