Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
