just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
