Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
