i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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