If i come over, it means nothing
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
