He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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