The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
you had me at cake vodka
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
