A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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